Saturday, July 21, 2012

A tribute to my women

This post has immense possibility to backfire on me and not least because some people who aren't mentioned here might take offence. This post is based on an assumption that I know these women and know them well enough to write about them and call them 'My Women'. It's not arrogance when I say that, it's more a sense of belonging and connectedness that I rarely feel for people.

Some things that are common in all these women are that they are strong yet vulnerable sometimes, independent yet needy sometimes, caring yet capable of lashing back, and most of all their immense capability to love and hate from all their heart. Sometimes I've got a glimpse of their vulnerabilities and always I have seen the heroic smile that they put on to never ever let anyone know that they hurt too. I've seen them cry, I've seen them hurt and on all of them I've seen the look of determination to put it all behind them and walk on. They personify life for me and in some way or the other they have made a dent in my life.

Obviously the top one in my list is my mother, though there is no particular order to the list after that.

Mom - It won't be cliched to say that I won't be here but for her, because I mean it in more ways than her just giving birth to me. She's the one who taught me that life is cruel and it hurts, she's the one who reassured that still it's more than worth your while to live with gusto. My mom, the indefatigable bundle of energy who can never sit idle and won't let you sit idle either, mom - who has this insatiable desire to learn anything and everything and the daredevil in her that would try out anything at least once. I could write a book on her and a paragraph in a blog can never do her justice. Enough to say that I am what I am because she lived her life for us, she fought for us, cried for us, starved for us and gave us every ounce of her life blood. So for that and much more she is and will always be on the top of this list.

Taiji - She inspires me because she made her choices in life and stuck to them. She chose what was best for her and her children. I admire her intellect, her grit, determination and practicality and her endless servings of tea and toast on those warm summer mornings :). I learnt to bake my first cake from her and I can still remember the story of 'Mishka and his porridge' that she told us to make us finish our food :).

Puja - My childhood friend and one of the only one who's lasted from school days. We are crazy together. We are crazy otherwise too. We meet often after years and after hours of non-stop yapping it is as if that gap was never there. I sometimes feel that our lives have run a parallel course in some ways. And though we can be poles apart in how we might deal with certain things, we feel the same way about them. She has nerves of steel and a temper to match. Mess with her at your own peril. She's fiercely independent and no nonsense sorts, loves dogs (and cats), doesn't know the meaning of time and bounces back every time life deals her a low hand. When I am feeling low I know this is one person I can reach out to and talk about any random thing for an immediate dose of laughter and cheer. She's the awesomest friend :) and a potential adopter of any children I might have :p

Sarah - My senior in college and the first person to rag me (A terrible ragger btw - not convincing at all because of the smile that was lurking behind that 'I am mean' look). Later she sort of adopted me and I've had countless cups of tea and midnight Maggie sessions in her hostel room. She's a brat who loves to mother you and probably after she's played a prank on you she'll cook you a brilliant meal. Her cooking is to die for and I feel we connect over our love for food, aesthetics and all things good in life. She's HOT (her legs are to die for!), she's a brilliant story teller, a great friend and a book lover. She's clobbered an eve-teaser for me, she's given me boyfriend advise, and we've gossipped away many a long hours. She's someone whom I know will be my support system anytime I need one.

Manjri - My roommate in college. She's stable, practical, sensible and completely crazy. Her best attribute is that she doesn't judge people. She accepts them for what they are and probably that's what is most important to me. She'll not tell you the right from wrong, because that's for you to decide, but in case you feel you've done wrong and fallen in a ditch, she'll be the first one to come and pull you out (Puja will probably be in the ditch with me!). She is completely dedicated to her work, does things that must be done, is always there to help anyone who needs her help. We've shared breezers together on windowsills, we've roamed the roads in the wee hours of the morning, we've given each other back rubs and miscellaneous beauty treatments. Somehow in all the craziness she's the voice of reason in my head, and though over years we've not met so often, there is always a feeling of connect that I have.

Kanu - My sister. She thinks since I am married I might as well be dead. I've blipped out of her radar that only detects excessively energetic people. She always has a gang of friends. She has a knack of attracting psychos too (not the friends). She can't cook to save her life and I've probably never met anyone crazier than her. I've bullied her, fought with her and lectured her. She's bawled her eyes out a couple of times. She's hit me more than she's bawled. She's fiery and temperamental. She's super emotional and can be shockingly rude. We don't meet as often as siblings should, we don't talk perhaps as often as siblings should.  I don't know her dreams, I don't know her thoughts, I know she's seen a few downs in her life, but she's dealt with them. What I know is that though she'll always be a 'younger sis' to me, she's a strong woman who, once she knows what she wants goes after it with vengeance and also once she knows what she doesn't want can get rid of it in a hurry. To this one I am forever connected.

Garima - She's the one who can blackmail me anytime she wants! She knows perhaps every little detail of my life and vice versa. We've spent 3 decades together and have managed to love each other to distraction :). I've tormented her with pranks, lectured her on life, yelled at her in despair for she is a perpetual dreamer. I've fought with her to get her to bridge dreams and reality but with no success. She's a bookworm, an idealist (which dreamer is not!) and a romantic. She's courageous enough to be a mother. She is passionate about things she wants to do. She is a dancer at heart. And though sometimes she disappoints me with letting go of things that I know she wants, it's patience that i have learnt from her. That and fortitude. I know she is my sympathetic ear and a pillar that will help me lessen any burden that i carry.

Karishma - The sweetest person I've ever known. She's innocence personified. We've been following each other for years now through 3 companies and 3 cities. We have a lot in common - we both dream about clothes, we both love to shop, we both are 'tea people', we hate to talk in mornings, we both suffer from headaches. Other than that I am fat, she's thin :p. She's adorable when drunk (otherwise too), loves her friends, has a rosy view of life and always does the right thing by people. Her house is always open for everyone and it's almost always full of people. She has a spare room for me and I'm planning to move in soon :p

Juveria - This is not because she follows my blog; this is because the little I know her, I've really come to admire her. Though it's been a short time spent together, I like the way she does things she wants to do. The photography, the trips, the events she attend, the circle of friends, the work with children all paint a picture that though a bit hazy for me is something i know is beautiful. I love the way she lives life without the need for anyone's approval which is something I lack. I think this will be my one learning from her - do things you want to do, whether it conforms to how others want you to be or not! Our acquaintance has been short, but she definitely makes it to my list.

There have been others, who've played a very important role in my life, who've loved me, helped me, supported me, added that smile to my day! To all of those women too I owe a bit of myself. Thank you all for being there for me :)
  

5 comments:

Ju said...

Wow!! the best post of yours I should say!! ;) Kanu's write up takes the cake I dunno why!!! you actually took time to write down about women in your life - hats off. And I am SHOCKED (happily) that I made it to the list!!!

And you wouldn believe it, I have been in the last two months summing up hell a lot of things I admire about you as well - never had a plan to jot them down though!! Ro and I have spoken about you from a long time. :)

You are a great woman too babes - love your spirit!! and you will do great!!

Dont lose touch!!

Puja Wahi said...

I love you! Now hurry up and have those babies!

vortex said...

@ju - now you must tell me what you have been talking about :D..
@puja - love you too... but you gotta wait for the babies... A LONG TIME!

Sarah said...

Oh dear girl that's a lovely write up which makes ordinary women not look so ordinary if I may say so. Can't say I am not swollen with vanity calling me hot n all but honey did I tell u that my XS barely covers my posterior. Yes our women bring to us our sense n sensibilities , they are pride n our prejudice. Be the way you are... Strong , beautiful and a lady to the core. Keep writing n you are just my kind of Soup... Tangy, wholesome n delicious

vortex said...

@Sarah - I love the way you have with words.. That's the best line (the soup one) ANYONE has ever said about me ;D

And there is no question that you are hot.. XS n all be darned... :P